• Skip to main content
  • Skip to secondary menu
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Wylie's Writing Tips

Improve your communications with our training, consulting, and writing services

  • Home
  • Writing training
    • Topics
      • Content-writing classes
      • Email-writing classes
      • Persuasive-writing classes
      • PR-writing classes
      • Readability classes
      • Storytelling-writing classes
      • Web-writing classes
      • Writing-process classes
    • In-house writing workshops
    • Public writing workshops
      • Clear writing | June 19-23
      • Writing process | Sept. 18-22
      • Web-writing | Oct. 23-27
      • PR Writing | Nov. 13-17
      • Email writing | Dec. 11-15
      • Past writing workshops
    • On-demand training
      • Think Like a Reader on-demand training
      • Think Outside the Pyramid on-demand training
      • Cut Through the Clutter on-demand training
      • Reach Readers Where They Look on-demand training
    • Writing training clients
    • Trainer
  • Writing tools
    • The Power Pack
    • Rev Up Readership: toolbox for writers
    • Art of Storytelling
    • Block Busters handbook
    • Clarify Complex Copy
    • Cut Through the Clutter manual
    • Get Good at Getting the Goods
    • Jargon: Start Making Sense
    • People Power
    • Think Like a Reader
    • Think Outside the Pyramid
  • Writing tips
    • Content writing
      • Relevant content writing
        • Relevant content writing resources
        • Relevant content writing quotes
      • Creative content writing
      • Structure for content
      • Readability for content
        • Resources on blog post length
        • Quotes on blog post length
      • Scannable web copy
      • Content writing resources
      • Content writing quotes
    • Email writing
      • Why email writing?
      • Subject lines
        • Resources on subject lines
        • Quotes on subject lines
      • Target your email
        • Quotes on targeted email
      • Feature story structure
      • Short, readable emails
        • Quotes on readable emails
      • Scannable emails
        • Quotes on how to write scannable email
      • Resources on email writing
      • Quotes on email writing
    • Microcontent
      • Skimming, scanning, reading
        • Resources on skimming, scanning, reading
        • Quotes on skimming, scanning, reading
      • Bulleted lists
        • Quotes on bullets lists
      • Callouts, pull quotes
        • Quotes on pull quotes and callouts
      • Captions, cutlines
        • Quotes on captions
      • Decks, summary blurbs
      • Headlines
        • Benefit headlines
        • Feature headlines
        • Web headlines
          • Quotes on web headlines
        • Quotes on headlines
      • Links, buttons
        • Quotes on links
      • Subheads
        • Quotes on how to do subheadings
      • Resources on display copy
      • Quotes on display copy
    • Persuasive writing
      • What’s in it for me?
        • Quotes on WIIFMs
      • Write about benefits
        • Quotes on verbs
        • Quotes on benefits
      • Write to, about You
        • Quotes on ‘you’ writing
      • Quotes about persuasive writing
    • Public relations writing
      • Target readers with PR writing
        • Relevant releases quotes
      • Organize PR writing
        • Leads for releases
          • Press release first paragraph
          • Quotes on press release leads
      • Quotations
        • Quotes about public relations quotes
      • Readability for PR
        • Quotes on ideal press release length
      • Headlines, display copy for PR
        • Headlines for releases
      • Resources on press releases
      • Quotes on press releases
    • Readability
      • Why readability?
        • Information overload
          • Information overload quotes
      • Message length
        • Why short content
        • Measure A.R.T.
        • Tighten your story angle
        • Resources on writing short content
        • Quotes on writing short content
      • Paragraph length
        • Quotes on paragraph length
      • Writing with statistics
        • Quotes on writing with statistics
      • Sentence length
        • Resources on short sentences
        • Quotes on good sentence length
        • Quotes on how to write a simple sentence
      • Passive voice
        • Quotes on the passive voice
      • Word length
        • Quotes on short words
      • Jargon
        • Quotes on jargon
      • Adjectives & adverbs
        • Quotes on adjectives & adverbs
      • Readable
        • Resources on readability
        • Quotes on readability
      • Conversational copy
        • Quotes on conversational business writing
    • Storytelling and creative writing
      • Concrete details
        • Why concrete details?
        • Types of concrete detail
        • Quotes on concrete details
      • Description
        • Quotes on scent
      • Human interest
        • Quotes on human interest
      • Metaphor
        • Why use metaphor?
        • Complex copy
        • Creative comparisons
        • Simplify stats
        • Cut clichés
        • Metaphor writing
        • Resources on metaphor
        • Quotes on metaphor
      • Storytelling
        • Why is storytelling important?
        • Find stories
        • Storytelling research
        • Elements of storytelling
        • Storytelling structure
        • Resources on storytelling
        • Quotes on storytelling
      • Wordplay
        • Alliteration
          • Resources on alliteration
        • Balance
        • Coin a word
          • Resources on coin a word
          • Quotes on coin a word
        • Quotes on the etymology of words
        • Rhyme
        • Rhythm
          • Quotes on using rhythm in writing
        • Twist of phrase
        • Quotes on how to use wordplay
      • Resources on creative copy
      • Quotes on creative copy
      • Quotes on boring copy
    • Type of articles
      • Case studies
      • Listicles
      • Tipsheets
    • Web writing
      • Why writing for the web?
        • Quotes on why writing for the web
      • Above the fold
        • Quotes on above-the-fold content
      • Tight web copy
        • Quotes on tight web copy
      • Scannable web copy
        • Quotes on scannable web copy
      • SEO for writers
        • Quotes on SEO
        • Quotes on SEO for releases
      • Quotes on crafting good web writing
      • Writing for mobile quotes
    • Writing
    • Writing process
      • Creative process
        • Quotes on creative process
      • Read like a writer
        • Resources on how to become a better writer
        • Quotes on how to become a better writer
      • Writing process
        • Prewriting
          • Research your story
            • Research quotes
          • Develop your story angle
          • Organize your piece
          • Quotes on prewriting stage of writing
      • Writing templates
        • Quotes on writing templates
    • Writing structure
      • Feature story structure
        • Why features structure?
          • Why feature structure?
        • Feature structure examples
        • Feature leads
        • Nut graph
          • Quotes on nut graph
        • Background section
          • Quotes on the background section
        • Body
          • Quotes on the body
        • Conclusion
          • Quotes on how to write good endings
        • Transitions
          • Quotes on transitions
      • Other story structures
      • Quotes on story structure
  • Writing newsletter
    • Current issue
    • What others say
    • Archives
  • Blog
  • Calendar
  • Why us?
    • About the trainer
    • Contact Ann

Features work for emails too

Concrete details make great invitation leads

Features work for emails too image
Before you hit ‘Send’ … Make sure your invitation shows instead of tells what people will be able to do or learn if they attend.
When I teach the feature-style story structure, communicators nod. It seems reasonable that readers would prefer concrete, creative stories to a hierarchical blurtation of facts.

BUT — and as Pee-Wee Herman said, there’s always a big but — they wonder, is the feature-style story structure for everything? Even emails? Even event invites?

Yes, Virginia, the feature-style story structure works for almost everything — emails included, event invites include. And here’s proof, thanks to Sarah Herr, employee communications manager at Sensus.

Sarah and her team have brought me in for two Master Classes this year, so these folks are serious about using best practices for reaching readers.

Which of these parties would you rather attend?

In our most recent workshop, Sarah was working on the Sensus holiday party invitation. Here’s where she started:

Reserve your spot at the Sensus Holiday Party and experience the event in a whole new venue this year! Based on your feedback, we’ve moved from a country club setting and into the North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences in downtown Raleigh.

During the event you will have run of the entire new portion of the museum, complete with science displays on three levels. While you mingle, enjoy drinks, live music and heavy hors d’oeuvres and carving stations.

But the key to a good invitation lead is to make folks want to attend the event. So tell them what they can look forward to in a concrete feature lead.

How would you find a feature lead for this story? I suggested that Sarah visit my BFF and research assistant, Google, to find out what her colleagues could do at the science museum.

Within minutes, Sarah has rewritten her piece:

Take a ride thousands of feet below the surface of the Atlantic Ocean, touch a stone that’s traveled through space for millions of years or find out just how much DNA you and “Fido” have in common. Do all this and more at the Sensus Holiday Party!

We’ve moved from a country club setting and into the North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences in downtown Raleigh. During the event you will have run of all four floors of the new Nature Research Center, complete with interactive science exhibits and dioramas. While you mingle, enjoy drinks, live music and heavy Hors d’oeuvres and carving stations.

Need a last minute Christmas gift? Be sure to enter the prize raffle — or pick up a gift at the museum store. The store has bugs encased in candy, fossils and models interesting enough for the scientist in all of us.

Features work for virtually all media, channels, topics and audiences. Why not make your next message — email invites included — more creative and compelling with a feature-style story structure?

Think Outside the Pyramid

Our old friend the inverted pyramid hasn’t fared well in recent research.

According to new studies by such think tanks as The Readership Institute and The Poynter Institute, inverted pyramids: 1) Reduce readership and understanding; 2) Fail to make readers care about the information; and 3) Don’t draw readers across the jump. In short, researchers say, inverted pyramids “do not work well with readers.”

At Catch Your Readers — a two-day Master Class on April 20-21 in Atlanta — you’ll learn a structure that can increase readership, understanding and satisfaction with your message. Specifically, you’ll learn:

  • How to organize your message to grab readers’ attention, keep it for the long haul and leave a lasting impression
  • Three elements of a great lead — and five leads to avoid
  • How to stop bewildering your readers by leaving out an essential paragraph. (Many communicators forget it)
  • Five ways to avoid the “muddle in the middle”
  • A three-step test for ending with a bang

Learn more.

Register for Persuavsive writing workshop in Atlanta


Browse all upcoming Master Classes.

Would you like to hold an in-house Catch Your Readers workshop? Contact Ann directly.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • LinkedIn
  • WhatsApp
  • Tumblr
  • Pinterest
  • More
  • Pocket
  • Email
  • Print

Filed Under: Articles Tagged With: email, leads, Organizing copy

Primary Sidebar

June 01, 2023

Rev Up Readability - Ann Wylie's clear-writing workshop on June 19

Save up to $100 with our group discounts.

Register for Rev Up Readability - Ann Wylie's clear-writing workshop on June 19
  • Would your piece be twice as good …Would your piece be twice as good … … if it were half as long?
  • 7 sources for sound statistics7 sources for sound statistics: How to hunt down numerical comparisons
  • Cut the fluffCut the fluff: Modifiers give ‘the illusion of meaning without its substance’
Archives

Wylie Communications, Inc. logo
    Training
  • In-house writing workshops
  • Public writing workshops
  • On-demand training
    Tools
  • Learning tools
  • RevvingUpReadership.com
  • Free writing tips
Subscribe to our ezine
Upcoming Workshops

Rev Up Readability - Ann Wylie's clear-writing workshop on June 19-23

How to Write Better, Easier and Faster - Ann Wylie's writing-process workshop on Sept. 18-22

Reach Readers Online - Ann Wylie's web-writing workshop on Oct. 23-27

NOT Your Father’s PR Writing - Ann Wylie's PR-writing workshop on Nov. 13-17

© Copyright 2023 · Ann Wylie · All Rights Reserved
May not be duplicated and shared without author's permission. Contact us.